Bernie Sanders Urges Government Takeover of Ben & Jerry’s Ice Cream

Democratic Presidential candidate Bernie Sanders today released a position paper calling for government takeover of Ben & Jerry’s Ice Cream. “The private sector is no longer meeting the ice cream needs of everyday Americans,” a Sanders’ spokesperson stated. “Senator Sanders has personally experienced a deficient number of chunks in Chunky Monkey. This reflects poorly on Ben & Jerry’s, it reflects poorly on Senator Sanders’ home state of Vermont, and it reflects poorly on the United States of America.”

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