Montpelier, Vermont — Senator Bernie Sanders today confirmed rumors that he will be donating his $60 million KFC inheritance to the Federal government.
Sanders released the following statement: “A fortune of this size comes with great responsibility. For many years I have considered donating the $60 million to Habitat for Humanity, Doctors Without Borders, Unicef, Rotary International, the ACLU, or some combination of these excellent organizations. But then I realized that when it comes to excellent organizations, there is no organization more excellent than the Federal government. The Federal government has a long track record of unparalleled wisdom and unmatched efficiency in its spending. The time has come for me to donate my inheritance to the Federal government, where I am confident it will be put to better use than any other institution I could possibly donate it to.”
Sanders received his inheritance from Harland David “Colonel” Sanders, upon Sanders’ passing in 1980. “I never wanted any of his money, but I loved my uncle so I couldn’t refuse the inheritance,” Senator Sanders said.
Sanders’ long-time financial advisor, Myron Peabody, of Montpelier, Vermont confirmed that Sanders’ fortune is in excess of $60 million. “Bernie lives very simply. You would never know that he is so wealthy. His original inheritance was only $10 million, but he never spent any of it, so his investment has grown steadily since he received it in 1980.”